by Shade Awosanmi -

Do not take children for granted

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They have feelings. Please don’t toy with a child’s emotions. Relate to this true life story and you will see how emotional children could be.
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Hmm! I’m concerned about the state of our country; the leadership, deteriorating health systems and particularly the educational system. The privately owned and very  expensive schools have replaced the government owned schools, yet the quality of education keeps diminishing. Do I really want my children to continue schooling here. This was the concern of Dan, a middle aged man, working with a government agency as an engineer. He was just thinking aloud.
 He shared his idea with his wife Becky. He wanted his first son, Matt, who is about to finish his junior high school to continue his education in the united kingdom. She welcomed the idea. She had always thought about this too.
 It was very easy to put the plans together because Becky was born in London in the early seventies, though she had never lived there. They concluded their plans and informed Becky’s younger  sister, Tracy,  who lives in London with her family. Tracy had always suggested this idea to them, so she was more than happy to hear that her nephew will be coming over to London to continue his schooling . A decision was reached for Becky to take her son to London by the next  summer.
 Matt’s younger brother Murray was excited that himself and his brother would be travelling to London in the summer, but he did not have a clue about how much he would miss his brother when he returned back home alone.
In London, Matt started school and  settled very well.  He was very happy living with his aunt and cousins, but he would for sure miss his family.
Four weeks came just in a flash. It was time for Becky and Murray to return back to Africa. His aunt’s husband took Murray and his mum to the airport. Matt accompanied them. It was a very emotional one for everyone especially Murray. As they were about to go through security check in, they had a warm hug and Matt immediately walked away with his uncle without looking back. Murray looked back and saw that his brother was out of sight.
He broke down and said to his mum.
So my brother does not love me as much I love him.
Why did you say that, asked his mum
He did not look back after he said goodbye, replied Murray
He loves you very much, but he just didn’t want you to feel bad, affirmed his mum
Okay, Murray reluctantly agreed.
They arrived the next morning, and Dan was waiting to pick them up from the airport. Murray was very happy to see his dad, but could not hide his emotion. He missed his brother so much. Dan insisted that he sat at the back seat of their family car with Murray, just to make him feel good, but his mum disagreed. Don’t worry dear, he would be fine,  Becky told her husband.
Schools have resumed about two weeks ago.   Murray was preparing to go back to school, but he was concerned about  what his brother’s friends would feel if he told them that Matt was not coming back to their school. He did not inform any of his friends before he left for UK.
He asked his dad what he should  tell Matt’s friend when they ask of him.
Just tell them that he would not be coming back to your school, but do not mention where he went. Dan told Murray. So you want me to tell a lie dad, Murray asked. Oh no. Not at all son. Tell them your brother relocated to UK, but the reason why he didn’t inform them was because your parents did not decide early enough.
Okay dad.
Murray was dressed up for school on Monday morning looking forward to a bright day. He called out to his mum. I am ready mum. It’s 7.30, let’s go mum.
Becky dropped him on her way to work. Have a blessed day son. You too mom, Murray replied.
It was lunch time and his brother’s friends:boys and girls came looking for Murray. They said to him: how are you doing. Where have you been. It’s good to have you back. Where is Matt.
Em. Em. Matt is not coming back to this school. He continued. He started school in London.
Really! Why did he not inform us?
When has he been planning this?
Does he not know how much we love him?
Why did he do this to us? So many questions that Murray could not answer.
That is not nice ! They all concluded.
It was a very emotional conversation, and Murray did not feel good about the whole situation.
It wasn’t his fault. That what the only statement from Murray.
Ring! Ring! The bell rang. Lunch was over. See you guys later. Murray said to them as everyone went to their various classes.
A few more hours and it was the end of school day and Dan came to pick up his son.
Good afternoon dad. Murray greeted as he was getting into the car. Immediately Matt’s friends sighted their friend’s dad, they all walked to the car and a new set of conversion started.
Good afternoon sir. They all chorused the greeting. Good afternoon guys. How are you all going replied Dan
Is it true that Matt is not coming back to this school, they demanded a confirmation. Yes, replied Dan.
He did not inform us at all. If he did, we would have sent him forth, and it wouldn’t have been a rude shock for us. We have missed him so much. He is a very dear friend to all of us. One of them broke down in tears.
Dan was close to tears now. I am so sorry that he did not  inform you. It wasn’t his fault, but ours. I sincerely apologize for this. Dan begged.
Can you please share his number with us. They requested. Sure! It’ s +44….. Thanks so much sir. They all took the number down. Let me see if I can put a video call through to him. Dan said. That will be very good sir. They agreed.
Matt picked the call promptly. Hello son! Your friends from your previous school are here. They would like to speak with you. Dan gave his phone to them. It was a joyous moment for all .  They were very happy to see Matt. They exchanged pleasantries. He apologized greatly and appreciated them all for their show of love. They had a warm goodbye after about half an hour.
Thanks so much sir. You made our day. You are most welcome guys. You will all meet again in good health and happiness. Amen, echoed the friends. Have a blessed evening. Dan told them, as he was about to start his car. At this time, Dan saw a girl running towards his car and trying to wave to him. God afternoon sir. My name is so and so.  I am one of Matt’s classmate and friend. I understand that he will not be coming back to this school, but  he did not inform any of us before he left. She tried to hold back tears but she couldn’t. I am so sorry my dear young girl. It wasn’t his fault but ours, responded Dan. I would like to have his number, she continued. Yes for sure. Here is the number, Dan replied. Have a blessed blessed day and pray that you all meet again in peace.
Thank you very much sir. My regards to him.
Dan said goodbye and drove off. He felt very happy that his son was being loved by his classmates, but felt bad that his son did not inform his friends that he was relocating. Dan wished that they would meet someday in the near future.
Lesson  learnt
1. Children could be very emotional, so adults shouldn’t take them for granted. If Matt’s parents told him to inform his friends, they would have been happier, probably had a sent forth for him
2. Humility in Dan”s personally. He called his son on video call for his friends to speak with him. He spared some time to be with them.  He also gave them his son’s number.
3. Those children may keep in touch and help each other someday.
4. They would never forget this experience. They may share with their parents or other friends, who may also learn something positive .
5. Tell a child you are sorry if it’s your fault. They will learn to do the same.
Dear readers. Let us always leave positive experience with children. They have their emotions, and they will not forget.
Dear God! Please crown all efforts on our children. Give us the effrontery to eat the fruits of our labor on them in the very near future amen. Please give to those who desire them a generation that will be submissive unto you amen.
by Shade Awosanmi -

Make out time to be with them and your children will make out time to be with you

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Salma lives in a North American city with her family. She works as a self employed with a very flexible schedule. Her schedule is always very light on Fridays because she always wanted to have some time for herself and family, and so goes to a coffee shop on Friday mornings immediately after dropping her daughter in school. She likes to have her breakfast outside of the home on Fridays and also to hang around there till noon.
On this beautiful Friday morning , she bought her tea and a sandwich and sat at her usual corner on a table made for four. She enjoyed sitting there because it’s a more comfortable seat which enables her to work on her computer, but she always welcomed anyone who wanted to share the table with her. This is not very common with Americans. Every one loved their space and they never encouraged anyone to share their space. In about half an hour after Salma had finished her breakfast, a lady suspected to be in her mid thirties entered the shop and was looking for a seat that could take seat three people. She was with an elderly man and a woman. In her usual practice Salma asked if she wanted a seat. The lady said yes and Salma invited her to seat at her table. The lady held the elderly man and she helped him to seat opposite Salma. The  elderly woman sat beside Salma and the lady sat opposite. The seniors both made a greeting sign by waving at Salma. They do not speak English.  This conversation ensued between Salma and the lady.
The lady: Hi. Thanks for inviting us to seat with you
Salma: Hi. How are you doing
The lady: very well thanks.
The lady was looking so happy and radiant. She brought out three wrapped sandwich from her bag,  unwrapped each one and gave  to each  of the seniors. She left hers on the table and went to get coffee. There was no line and she came back in about 2 minutes with 3 cups of coffee for each person. She was so happy, likewise the seniors. They were speaking their local language. Within a few minutes,  Salma noticed the relationship between the lady and the seniors and she couldn’t hold back to let this lady know how much she loved her noticeable great relationship between her and her parents. Salma interrupted their conversation.
Are they your parent Salma asked
Yes they are, replied the lady. I usually pick them from their house and spend time with them like this on a regular basis. She continued.
Salma: Do you live around here.
No. She replied. I live about 40 minutes away, but they live around the corner.
Salma. Wao. This is very good and kind of you. Some people need to learn this.
The lady: Yes you are right, but this is very normal from my original country.
Salma. I pray that your children do the same for you.
The lady: amen. That is very true. She narrated ” A few weeks ago, my 7 year old daughter watched me as I rubbed Vaseline on my mother’s hand and massaged it. I did not notice, but she came to me a few days after, rubbed Vaseline on my palm and massaged it. She said to me ” I saw you do the same for grandma and that is why I am doing it for you too.    This really touched me and I learnt a good lesson too.
Salma was very inspired and she asked the lady for her name and number.
My name is Zulikha and here is my number.
Zulikha was translating some part of the conversation for her dad, who admitted that Salma was a nice lady, having invited them to seat with her and also being friendly with them. He said in their language, anyone who show mercy to others will have God’s mercy  . He  prayed for Salma and they were ready to leave now. Zulikha exchanged pleasantries and had a warm goodbye!
Lesson learned
1. Make time out for your parents, no matter how old they are. Be kind to them.
2. Be patient and happy when you are with them. You will make them very happy.
3. Be accommodating to others in public places, we will leave everything behind except our good deeds.
4. Strangers are friends you have just met and may be friends you will ever meet.
Dear God! Grant us the heart of kindness towards our parents and make our children replicate us in good deeds. Have a blessed weekend as we make out quality time for our parents
by Shade Awosanmi -

Help someone in need

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John lived in a 4 bedroom bungalow with his family; his wife and three children. The bungalow was built on a massive plot of land, big enough for two houses. The house was owned by an international manufacturing company where he worked as an accountant. He rose to the position of a director in a few years. He was very diligent at his job, not only as a top executive, but also someone of high integrity and astute professionalism worthy of emulation. As a self-made man from a very humble beginning, he believed so much in personal development. He read books at his spare time. He took reading as his hobby and spent quite a substantial amount of money growing his personal library. Aside reading, he believed that giving, especially to people in need was a great way to appreciate His creator who has been good to him and his family. The apartment, being his company’s property was rented to him as part of the incentives attached to the office of the Director. This area was occupied by the elites of this mega city of a West African state. The reason why anyone would be able to live in this particular community was through inheritance, being a top government official or company’s executives, and successful business owners. Having worked for a number of years at his present job, the company decided to sell the property to John. He had always believed in saving right from his early working years, as he was only able to further his education pass high school from his personal savings. This made it an attractive opportunity to jump at the offer of buying the property from his company. The Company offered him a soft loan to make up for the cost of  acquiring the land. The loan was to be repaid from the rent he would  get from so many years of renting the property once it is completed.

The next step after acquiring the property was to build a dividing fence to separate the other half of the land from the house where he lived. A few years passed, and he was ready to build this land into a block of 6 flats, to be used as an investment property. He hired the services of building professionals; Architects, structural Engineers and a building contractor. Living in this community, coping with the hustle and bustle of working in a metropolitan city and being a top executive at the peak of his profession was enough for anyone not to feel the pains and cry of down trodden class of the society. This was not the case with John.

He was excited and could not wait to see the building to completion and so, would visit the site every night when he got back from work. He used his torch light to go into the site and inspect the progress of construction. On this particular night, he noticed a reflection of light from one of the rooms under construction. He was very surprised, stepped back for a moment and went closer. He saw a young boy in his teens using a candle light to study.

Who are you? What are you doing here? Demanded John

My name is Tammy. I am one of the general labors working here during the day. I am sorry Sir! Responded the young man

Tammy continued. I’m studying for an entrance exam to the university, and couldn’t afford to travel back every night to where I live. I had to work to pay for the examination, and would not do myself any good if I do not prepare well.

Oh! OK! Tell me about yourself and your family. Demanded John

Tammy continued. My dad died a few years and my mom is really struggling to take care of myself and my sibling. It’s not been easy for her.

John was so sorry for this young man and he said to him: please let me know when you get your results. I wish you the very best. Thank you sir. I will surely do. Responded Tammy.

John informed his wife Anne of his conversation with Tammy and they both agreed to help him through school if his results were good enough to get him admitted.

A few months later, the construction was completed, but Tammy did as he was told. He had written the entrance exam to get into the Mechanical Engineering program and had passed. He informed John, who was so happy of his success. Congratulations Tammy. I’m so proud of you.  What are the tuition and other living expenses? We are going to take care of the tuition immediately. Reaffirmed John. How much would you require monthly for other expenses.

Five thousand bucks sir, responded Tammy.

I will pay the Living expenses into your bank account every month, starting from the first month of the school year. Tammy thanked John and his wife exceedingly. He was very excited, very appreciative of his new “adopted” parents and looked forward to a great school year. He came back after a few days, with his mum and siblings to show his heart felt appreciation to John and his family. What a warm welcome to receive them.

Years passed, but Tammy did not forget the promise he made to himself. He must succeed! He was very diligent at his studies and focused more on completing his course of study with his desired outcome. He visited John and his family occasionally and he became a part of the family, received a warm welcome anytime he visited.

Four years went by just like a flash. He did very well, and was on the honor roll throughout the program. He made both his mum and his adopted parents very proud, and his graduation was a dream comes true. Thank goodness, he made it with distinction! The next step was to secure an employment with a reputable firm to at least make a living. He prepared a good resume and applied to so many Engineering companies. The job did not come forth. Looking for a job is a job in itself. There were not many interviews, and the few ones did not get this young man a job. He became so frustrated, and approached John one day.

Daddy, what can I do for you in the house, to engage me in the meantime? Tammy asked.

You know I have domestic workers already, and it would be unfair to relieve them of their job without a reason. Do not worry my dear. Yours will come very soon by God s grace amen. Replied John.

The young man did not give up. He extended his search outside the shores of his country.

He got a job at an Engineering company in Europe. It was a fantastic offer. He needed to apply for a work visa with his offer letter, so that he may travel overseas to start his career. Tammy went to see John to share the good news. Congratulations Tammy. What next. John asked.

I need a work visa, but I do not have the funds to process the visa or buy the travel ticket.

How much will it cost, demanded John. I will give you the processing fees and the air fare when you are ready to go. Concluded John

I cannot thank you enough. May God bless you more and more sir.

Tammy traveled to another city where the consular office was. The work visa was issued, and he purchased his flight ticket.

The D-day was here, Tammy left his country feeling very happy and excited. What the new country holds is unknown to him, but the fact that he was going to start a career in his course of study meant a lot to him.

He had settled down in his new country, and his next ambition was marriage. He fell in love with a young vibrant lady, from his country of origin. Her background, humility, decency and disposition to life were an envious one. A few months into their relationship, she already knew who John was, and what impacts he had made to Tammy’s life. The relationship worked well within a few years, and Tammy proposed to Yolanda. They both agreed to have their marriage in their country of origin, as their parents and those who matters in their lives needed to be present at the wedding. Tammy called to inform John and Anne, that a date has been fixed and that John will be standing in the position of his biological dad. It was a welcome responsibility for John and Anne. They supported their marriage in every way possible. It was a very colorful occasion and celebration. No extravagance, but a good celebration of love. Everyone present witnessed a memorable event. The couple traveled back a few weeks after their marriage. It was a great honey moon for them.

A few months after their marriage, Tammy felt the need to show his appreciation. He sent a cash gift of fifty thousand bucks to John and Anne. They appreciated it a lot, but John told him that all he needed to know was that Tammy was happy and living well with his family.

Tammy and Yolanda are now living in bliss and we wish them both a happy married life with kids who will fill their home with joy and laughter amen. John and Anne are retired, and are living well in North America. May God bless them with a very healthy life amen.

Lesson learnt

  1. Pay attention to the people around you. You may see the need to lift someone up
  2. Help in every little way possible. It goes a long way
  3. Do not be quick to react to strangers, except it is a positive one.

Dear God. Make us good instrument for others, and please reward us with bounties that knows no bound amen.

 

 

 

 

by Shade Awosanmi -

Kindness has no limit

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This is a story of an unlimited kindness that was shown to me some years ago. Mandy relates this unforgettable experience.

It was in the summer break of year 2000. I dropped my two kids 6 and 3 as usual with my mum to go to work. It was a pay day, and after the day’s work, I went to the bank to collect the stipend from my civil servants salary. I did some grocery and toy shopping for my kids. I always wanted them to have a swell time when I get paid. With a lot of enthusiasm, they looked forward to getting home to play with their new toys and ate some candies, shortbread and many more. I drove my old cherry car to pick them up around 6.30 PM,  and we headed home.

On a good day, the journey would take about an hour as I live in a suburb. As I merged onto a major highway in a busy metropolitan city of West Africa, the unthinkable happened. I was in the middle lane on the side that exited the city. The car suddenly stopped. What could that be! I thought. I didn’t know what to do. It was very dangerous as cars were speeding from left and right. In about 2 minutes, some three guys referred to as ” the area boys” showed up from nowhere to help, at least to push the car off the road to safety. My son of  6 years started crying. One of the 3 guys immediately said” it’s a timing chain problem” I thought to myself ” is he a mechanic” I did not disagree with his statement, neither did I agree. One of them went and brought with him a road side mechanic. The fear of a road side mechanic in this city back then was the beginning of wisdom, but I did not have any choice. The mechanic came and said the same. A car Timing chain was not an easy fix. As we were deliberating on what to be done, I heard someone called out my name from the other side of the road, the side that goes into the city. It was one of my colleagues and a friend, Ada. She was driving home. She shouted” Do not allow any road mechanic, I will go and bring my good mechanic” After about half an hour, she came with an apprentice mechanic because her mechanic was too busy to come. At this time, I had to pay some token to the area boys and the road side mechanic who I told to hands-off immediately Ada arrived with her mechanic.

The apprentice said it was a different issue. The trial and error kind of car diagnostics usually done by our mechanics is not comparable to what exist in other parts of the world.  From contact set to battery to alternator etc., none of his solution worked. It was about 7.30 pm now, we were all getting exhausted, and another colleague of ours drove past. Ada stopped and asked him for help. He said he could not help because he was getting late for his part time long distance learning. He drove away.

It was dark now, and we could not still figure out what was wrong with the car. In a few minutes, I looked up and noticed from a distance, my company’s staff bus, the one that terminated in the suburb where I lived. The thought that first came to my mind was to abandon this old rickety car and join the staff bus with my kids who were hungry and tired. As I was thinking aloud, I just spoke out and this conversation ensued

Me: Oh my God, look at the staff bus.

Ada: Is it the one that plied to your area.

Me: Yes

Ada: Please pick your bags, get ready with your children, and I will waive it down for you.

Me: I couldn’t believe my ears. Really!

Ada: Yes, she repeated emphatically.

Me: How could I leave you here with my car trouble and go?

Ada: Do not worry!  Just come to my house tomorrow. Whatever the situation, I will tow it from here to my house.

Me: I was so emotional, because I felt this was an unusual limitless kindness. I thanked her greatly with a warm hug.

My kids were happy as we hopped on the staff bus. As we were going home, I cannot stop thinking of this help from Ada. She was a wonderful human being who would go extra mile to help anyone.  We got home safely, but very  late. I went to her house the following morning with my mechanic who did the correct diagnosis and guess what: Timing Chain issue” Lessons learnt

  1. No matter what, some people will stand by you come rain come shine. Ada is one of those and she does this to everyone. Appreciate them if you have people like this.
  2. Do not prejudge. The road side mechanic was right, but because of my prejudice, did not give him a chance. if I did, we would not have been there for so long. Give people a chance to prove themselves.
  3. Sometimes, you may not be able to help, but still show some empathy. The other colleague of ours did not show care at all. He made us feel that his own thing was more important to him. Do not be self centered. You may need somebody’s help soon.
  4. Those area boys rendered a great help by pushing the car off the road, and also getting a mechanic. If given the opportunity in our society, they could make themselves more useful to others. Maybe a free vocational school could better their lives. If you can, please help and give someone the opportunity

 

Folks! Show some level of care and empathy, even when you cannot really help. May God bless Ada and make all her aspiration s realized by His grace amen. May God bless us and make us a blessing for others.

May God meet us all at the point of our needs amen.

by Shade Awosanmi -

Parents; human or animals, will always protect their children no matter what

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I watched two geese, suspected to be a male and female on a Friday afternoon, taking care of their newly hatched goslings ( baby birds). They were seven in number, and were trying to find their feet after their birth. Their parents were obviously trying to move to another location that they thought was safer for their young ones. Immediately the geese led the way, the goslings followed, but were slow as expected. They were a few minutes old, but one of them was very slow. It was apparent that this particular one was not looking well and kept a far distance from the others, not because it did not like its siblings but because it was not as healthy,and so could not walk as fast as the others. It was really struggling to survive, walking and falling but desirous of following the group.
 
There were a few passersby at this time, which made it important that the sick bird be protected by its parents. Now you can see the role of a parent in action.
 
One of the parents, suspected to be the gander( male geese), noticed this and waited behind to see that his child was not taken away by a stranger. He stood by it, looked at the young bird and sort of signaled and said something like” try and get up, let’s go, it’s not safe for you” It was a big challenge for it to move. The other goose, suspected to be the female saw the situation and came back to where her sick baby was. She started crying and raised her head up. She made a warning sign like “don’t move near” and stood there for a while. She then decided to start walking back to where they started from , probably when it became obvious that her baby cannot make it to their destination. All these happened for more than half hour. Immediately she turned back, the other goslings followed but the sick bird was struggling. The distance from where they departed was shorter, and so the journey was easier for the sick bird. They were back to their initial position.
At this position, the gander( male goose) stood up, lifted its head high up, made some fearful noise and was ready to attack any passersby that came near his children. It was beside the regular entrance to a Mosque and it was time for the Friday prayers. More and more people tried to get in, but it was a mini war as the gander tried to attack them. Everyone was forced to go through another entrance to get in because of the fear of being attacked by this “protective dad”. From this, I learnt a few things
 
1. A parent will always be protective of their young ones; human or animals
2. Sometimes, a parent is just helpless in some situation. Human being may seek help from others, pray and get support. Animals don’t have many choices other than to attack
3. Both parents are very important in the lives of a child. Let us treat them well & equally
4. Sometimes when it is difficult to go forward, you take a step back, look inward, plan, focus and you will move forward .
5. God speaks to us every day through different medium. It is just for us to listen, understand and act accordingly. In about 45 minutes, many passers-by were watching, taking pictures, recording videos and giving glorification to God. I also decided to take pictures and write about my experience. Hope you learn something. Have a blessed weekend.
 
May God protect our children , grant those who desire them and make us good parents amen
by Shade Awosanmi -

What we do or did not do as parents will come back to us. 

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What we do or did not do as parents will come back to us. whether by way of appreciation or crucification.  Please do it well and teach them well.

Sumayah, a young girl in her early teens and the last of 5 children, attended an elementary school in a metropolitan city of West Africa in the year 1927. She was in year three in a missionary school. Education at this time was a privilege, and very few children had this luxury. Thank God for the early missionaries that gave so many children the great hope of learning how to read and write. Most children just went to farms and helped their mothers with their petty trade and house chores. Sumayah was one of the lucky few. She had started school late because, during this period, your arm needed to be long enough to stretch over your head to reach your opposite ear before you could start. Her older siblings did not have any formal education, but instead local apprenticeship training. She went to school on a beautiful and bright day with the intention of participating in all the numerous learning activities. One of her daily activities was to stand up for a few minutes and exercise the body. Sumayah’s desk was right by the door and so she had the advantage of being the first to step out of the class at the end of each day once all of the pupils had finished singing the following song:

“Now the day is over
Night is drawing near
Shadows of the evening
Still across the sky”

On this very day just before lunch, the teacher asked the pupils in Sumayah’s class to stand up and close their eyes for a while, just to get them to concentrate and focus better. It was a regular practice anytime the pupils were not paying attention. After about ten minutes, the teacher asked them to sit, but Sumayah who remained standing was far asleep. When the teacher noticed that Sumayah was still standing and asleep, he went straight for his cane. Fai! Fai! Fai! The cane landed on Sumayah’s head. Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Cried Sumayah, who immediately ran out of the class and headed straight home. She cried till she got to her parents’ house, which was about a ten minute walk from school.
“Good day dad”, Sumayah greeted, with tears flowing down her cheeks.
What is the matter with you Sumayah, asked her father.
I was beaten by my teacher because…. Sumayah narrated the whole story.
Who gave your stupid teacher the audacity to flog my daughter, asked Sumayah’s dad, who raved and ranted for a while. He rained a lot of curses and abuses on the teacher, from miles away.
Don’t worry my daughter, He continued. I have prepared some food for you. Go and bring the pot of food, so I could dish it for you.
OK daddy, responded Sumayah.
She quickly munched the plate of food and laid down on the bed, covered herself with a duvet and fell asleep. This was her father’s instructions that was carried out by Sumayah.
What a nice loving father, Sumayah had thought, but that was the very end of a great opportunity to learn.
Many years passed and Sumayah felt a great need to be educated. She was married with 4 boys. It was too late. She always wanted to speak some grammar, but all she could do was to make people laugh hard as a result of her “bad” English. Every time this happened, Sumayah told the story of how her father stopped her from going to school because the teacher scolded her. She told her children and grandchildren of how her father truncated her ambition. She cursed the dad who passed away many years before.

Sumayah lived a very good life but ever regretted how she was not able to complete her education. She passed away in the late 1980s at the age of 73.

Lesson learnt
1. Teach your child the right things, so she will not curse you later
2. Scold your child hard if need be, they will appreciate and pray for you later in life
3.  A child will always be a child, but a parent should always be firm because they know better.
Dear Lord! We are Shepherd for our children. Please help us to guide our flocks and make them guidance for others. Please let them remember us with a lot of appreciation and prayers amen.
Dear Lord. Please grant those that are desirous of them a generation of true believers amen
Have a happy school year as we do our duties of raising our children and directing them to the right path.

by Shade Awosanmi -

Involve your children when you care for your parents

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Murray, a Mechanical Engineer in his early fifties, lives with his wife and 2 boys in an urban city of a West African state. He is the last of a sibling of 6. His growing up was not without hurdle. Since the dad passed away at a very young age, his mum had faced the challenges of raising her last 3 kids with her menial fish trade. Though she got little support from the older children who were working after their high school graduation, most of the responsibility still rested on her. Having seen all that his mum passed through in raising them as a single parent, Murray had a lot of determination to succeed and help his mum someday. Thank God. He got admitted to the university to study Engineering. It was a very tough life living on university residence with little money to buy food, textbooks handouts and other things. He visited home often to get cooked food and to supplement what he had for living expenses. There was a particular weekend that he went home feeling very frustrated about his situation, and the thought of dropping out of the university came to his mind. The grandmother of blessed memory, advised and encouraged him to carry on in the university. She told him to endure a bit more, and that his  sweat  will soon turn into sweet. That was the best advice that Murray got at the time. Surely it did! He secured a job with a government utility company as a plant officer, though with meager salary, he rose steadily to become a plant manager.
It’s been pay back time since the last 3 decades. He cared very much for his mum, who is about 90 years old now, not only taking care of her housing and feeding, but also her emotional needs. The other siblings supported her in every little way possible,  some in cash and others in kind. The eldest sibling lives with their mum and takes good care of her.
Murray visited his mum regularly with his family. On a particular workday,  Murray picked up his boys; Mayor 13 and Matt 11 from school. He informed them that he would stop by to drop a carton of noodle that their grandma had earlier requested for. They stopped at a grocery store on the way and bought two cartons of the noodle. When they got to grandma’s house, Murray instructed his youngest son, Matt to carry one of the noodle carton to grandma. Good afternoon grandma echoed the boys. She was very happy to see her grand sons. “Good afternoon my dear husbands” responded grandma. They exchanged pleasantries. This is for you grandma said Matt as he handed over the carton of noodle to her. She was very excited, happy and prayed for the boys and their dad. They waited for about an hour. It’s was time to leave, and the boys bade grandma goodbye. Bye grandma. We will see you soon by God s grace. Bye my dear responded grandma as they left.
This conversation ensued between Murray, Mayor and Matt in the car
Matt “Dad! Are you the one that takes care of grandma”
Murray “Yes son. As you know, she is now old and cannot work again”
Matt” Does it mean that my brother and I will have to take care of you when you grow old?
Murray ” Yes son”
Matt” Okay dad. I will buy you a car and take good care of you as you are taking care of grandma, when I start working”
Murray ” Your wishes shall be fulfilled by God s grace”
Matt & Mayor “Amen”
It was a very emotional one for Murray. Despite this , he had been able to pass across an important lesson on the need to involve your children when you take care, and give to your parents. His only regret was not been able to take care of his grandmother who passed away about twenty five years ago, a week after he started working.  Lesson learnt:
1. Your challenges as a child should propel you to become a better adult.
2. You can provide both in cash and in kind for your parents. Murray’s elder sister is the one living with their mum; cooking, washing and making sure she eats and look healthy.
3. Involve your children when you give to your parents. They will remember and do the same for you when you grow old. Don’t just tell them, but let them see you do it.
4. There is ease after hardship. Tough times will not last but tough people will.
Have a blessed week as you give to your parents and involve your children.
by Shade Awosanmi -

All you need is a heart to give

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At a West African pharmaceutical store recently, an elderly woman walked in and met Abbie, who was trying to get prescription drugs for her husband. The old woman wanted to buy an eye drop prescribed by her eye doctor. She needed this eye medication to treat glaucoma. The old lady asked the pharmacy technician if they had the particular eye drop in stock. Yes! The technician responded. The price is 1,500 bucks. The old lady, with a sigh said ” why has the price suddenly jumped up by 200 bucks within a month! Why do you keep increasing the price of medication. This is not fair! Lamented the old lady. The technician responded that the increase in price was not from the pharmacy. Abbie was apparently listening to the conversation and decided to jump in at the time when the old lady wanted to leave because she could not afford it. This conversation ensued
Abbie: Hi ma’am. I actually bought the same eye drop for my mum at another pharmacy a week ago for 1800 bucks, so 1500 is a reasonable price.
The old lady: Really! Hmm, but I paid 1300 bucks for it last month. Repeated the old lady. OK.
As she was about to leave the drug store, Abbie called and asked her to bring the 1300 bucks. She then added 200 bucks for her to pay for the eye drop. The old lady was super happy,  radiant and  thanked Abbie exceedingly. God bless you real good, affirmed the old lady.
She paid for the eye drop and left with a very happy heart and face.
Abbie was also very pleased as she left the pharmacy. The reason why Abbie paid the difference:
1. It’s possible that the old lady’s children contributed all they had, and so she might not be able to get additional money from them.
2. It’s possible that she saved from her pension to buy this medication, and she will not have more money until the next pension is paid.
3. What if she cannot raise more money to buy this medication and the glaucoma leads to blindness?
Lesson learnt:
Little help counts, please mount it.
I wish the African government will some day be able to provide free health care especially to seniors.
Folks! Lend a hand! Help someone in need. It doesn’t have to be big to be deep. May God grant us the wherewithal to do more amen. Enjoy a blessed weekend as you extend the hands of giving to someone.
by Shade Awosanmi -

Be patient with your parents when the tables turn

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Mandy, a woman in her early fifties, watched with amazement a mother with her toddler of about 10 months, in a busy metropolitan city of West Africa. The mother sat at the front of a shop to breast feed her pretty baby girl . The toddler was really enjoying the milk from her mama’s breast as evident from her, raising one of her legs up. She was scratching her head with one hand and the other hand tightly held to the mum’s breast. After about 15 minutes, she took a rest from sucking, looking into the mum’s eyes with a big smile, hugging the mum and jumping from the mother’s hand at the same time. The mother put her on the floor,  held one of her hands and slowly released it for her to stand on her feet. They were both excited and smiled at each other. She patiently watched her as she learned to stand by herself.  What an experience!! It is interesting to watch them grow! The big question is whether it will be that interesting to watch the parents age. Folks! Be patient with your parents when they age and learn to walk again. Remember! They were very patient with you when you were young.

Dear God! Grant us the patience and wherewithal to take care of our parents when they grow old. Please take care of them as they took care of us when we were young, and grant those that have passed away eternal rest amen.  Have a parent friendly week.

by Shade Awosanmi -

Put up your bright side

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You walked in and greeted him with a frown!  She said hello with a smile, and you gave a plastic smile! You never know who you are going to find favor from! You never know who God is going to use to change your life for good! It does not matter what you are going through. You don’t have to transfer aggression to others. Everyone has his or her own issues to deal with, and you don’t have a clue about what their own challenges are! Folks! Be nice and friendly to people even when you are not bright inside. Dear God ! Brighten my heart to lighten other’s amen. Have a bright  weekend as you show the brighter side of you to others