Murray, a Mechanical Engineer in his early fifties, lives with his wife and 2 boys in an urban city of a West African state. He is the last of a sibling of 6. His growing up was not without hurdle. Since the dad passed away at a very young age, his mum had faced the challenges of raising her last 3 kids with her menial fish trade. Though she got little support from the older children who were working after their high school graduation, most of the responsibility still rested on her. Having seen all that his mum passed through in raising them as a single parent, Murray had a lot of determination to succeed and help his mum someday. Thank God. He got admitted to the university to study Engineering. It was a very tough life living on university residence with little money to buy food, textbooks handouts and other things. He visited home often to get cooked food and to supplement what he had for living expenses. There was a particular weekend that he went home feeling very frustrated about his situation, and the thought of dropping out of the university came to his mind. The grandmother of blessed memory, advised and encouraged him to carry on in the university. She told him to endure a bit more, and that his sweat will soon turn into sweet. That was the best advice that Murray got at the time. Surely it did! He secured a job with a government utility company as a plant officer, though with meager salary, he rose steadily to become a plant manager.
It’s been pay back time since the last 3 decades. He cared very much for his mum, who is about 90 years old now, not only taking care of her housing and feeding, but also her emotional needs. The other siblings supported her in every little way possible, some in cash and others in kind. The eldest sibling lives with their mum and takes good care of her.
Murray visited his mum regularly with his family. On a particular workday, Murray picked up his boys; Mayor 13 and Matt 11 from school. He informed them that he would stop by to drop a carton of noodle that their grandma had earlier requested for. They stopped at a grocery store on the way and bought two cartons of the noodle. When they got to grandma’s house, Murray instructed his youngest son, Matt to carry one of the noodle carton to grandma. Good afternoon grandma echoed the boys. She was very happy to see her grand sons. “Good afternoon my dear husbands” responded grandma. They exchanged pleasantries. This is for you grandma said Matt as he handed over the carton of noodle to her. She was very excited, happy and prayed for the boys and their dad. They waited for about an hour. It’s was time to leave, and the boys bade grandma goodbye. Bye grandma. We will see you soon by God s grace. Bye my dear responded grandma as they left.
This conversation ensued between Murray, Mayor and Matt in the car
Matt “Dad! Are you the one that takes care of grandma”
Murray “Yes son. As you know, she is now old and cannot work again”
Matt” Does it mean that my brother and I will have to take care of you when you grow old?
Murray ” Yes son”
Matt” Okay dad. I will buy you a car and take good care of you as you are taking care of grandma, when I start working”
Murray ” Your wishes shall be fulfilled by God s grace”
Matt & Mayor “Amen”
It was a very emotional one for Murray. Despite this , he had been able to pass across an important lesson on the need to involve your children when you take care, and give to your parents. His only regret was not been able to take care of his grandmother who passed away about twenty five years ago, a week after he started working. Lesson learnt:
1. Your challenges as a child should propel you to become a better adult.
2. You can provide both in cash and in kind for your parents. Murray’s elder sister is the one living with their mum; cooking, washing and making sure she eats and look healthy.
3. Involve your children when you give to your parents. They will remember and do the same for you when you grow old. Don’t just tell them, but let them see you do it.
4. There is ease after hardship. Tough times will not last but tough people will.
Have a blessed week as you give to your parents and involve your children.
